Looking back on my life supporting others
Les reflects on his personal experience of living with, and supporting, those affected by MS for over more than forty years.
I first encountered MS when I married my wife Robina in 1976. She’d been diagnosed with MS in her teens whilst growing up in Aberdeen. However, her mother never told her as she herself didn't understand the illness or its potential effects.
As newlyweds we set up home in Saltash, Cornwall – close to my hometown of Plymouth. It was here that we encountered the realities of living with MS.
I got up one sunny morning to go to work, only for Robina to ask why I was leaving in the middle of the night. We realised she couldn’t see. Our doctor disclosed this episode of temporary blindness was caused by MS, which was progressive and for life. Robina was determined not to have MS dictate her life. We sought out information about MS and over time got her a small car. We managed to move to a bungalow to overcome mobility problems.
Supporting others
We’ve been committed to supporting others all our lives. Whether it be through church, special needs education (our eldest son is also profoundly deaf, but we managed to keep him in mainstream education through to university), registering to offer child respite care, involvement in school and adult education, or involvement in activities with various MS society groups.
I first joined the local MS Society group in Cornwall as a member of the Coordinating Team. I did a little counselling but was mainly involved in fundraising and raising awareness through tabletop events. The social interaction was really rewarding. Employment then took us to Leicester where again we re-established MS Society links. We continued the fundraising and awareness activities within the community.
Being there for the Banbury community
Some 15 years ago we made our last move to Banbury where we took on leadership roles within the group. We organised and took part in many social events. Living with MS within the family gave us valuable knowledge and experience, which we were able to share with our group members and fellow volunteers. Involvement in the Cornwall and Leicester groups also helped, as did my employment background in training, development and leadership.
Group activities have been wide and varied from monthly coffee afternoons, social outings and annual teas, to involvement in Town Mayors events. We’ve also made information sheets available in doctors’ surgeries, local hospital clinics and in the local shopping precinct.
Since COVID-19 stifled many of the social activities enjoyed by the group, I’m still running a monthly coffee afternoon. It's supported by a dozen or so stalwarts and is seeing one or two new faces. They all rely on, and enjoy, the social contact on offer. Hopefully, given the right opportunities, we’ll be able to find a way to reintroduce more activities again.
I’ve found volunteering very emotionally rewarding
Life-long association with the MS Society and those affected by MS has been very emotionally rewarding for me. Especially when I get feedback from people we’ve supported. My biggest personal achievement is keeping the local group alive through whatever obstacles confront us. And still being able to be there for people with MS.
Sadly, it’s also been during our time in Banbury that Robina started losing her ability to fight the latter stages of MS. I found myself taking early retirement and taking over household activities. Even being allowed into the kitchen to prepare family meals and do the ironing! But Robina fought until the end.
To close I would like to ask new volunteers to join us. At 76 it’s time to recognise I can't continue forever. If you, or anyone you know, is looking for a rewarding social volunteering role, contact the MS Society now. You won’t regret the experience and rewards of the social interaction. And the knowledge that you're helping others.
